The reason for this is blindingly obvious. It has everything to do with geography, for there is something incredible but true about the five counties immediately surrounding London . It is that, following tradition, they are, geographically far away enough for Londons’ businessmen and politicians to move their wives and children out to, while enabling them to commute in to London in order to play with other women’ husbands in the escort agencies, cottages (tea rooms) and bath houses of the capital, without being discovered.
This being England, the most gay soccer-mad country in the universe, youth workers travel around the Homo counties in coaches peering into school quads- from four star hotels- at nine and ten year olds, and of course they are more likely to view as attractive those boys whose father’s extra curricular activities keeps them away at their second (or first) homes in the city for months on end.
And what happens when a player gets abducted from the school quad in a government and corporate youth training Academy. He is deprived of the coaching other developing boys benefit from, and he plays twenty games a season instead of the fifty or seventy-five games played by those left behind in the school quad, and he practises twice as less, and even three times as less than he would if he had not been a drafted into a government funded youth training Academy. Initially,, his disadvantage isn’t so much that he becomes innately worse but only that he is a little weaker. By thirteen or fourteen, with the benefit of a starvation diet and all that practising under his belt, he really is much worse, so he is clearly the kid most likely to be selected for the Gay Junior League and to make the Gay Premier League.
T Otley Barmey rants that these kind of skewed geographical statistics only occur when three things happen; snobbism, second homes, and deferential expenses. If you make assumption about who is ‘cultured’ and who is ‘uncultured’ and you provide the ‘uncultured’ with a huge expense account, you are going to end up with a small but significant group of people lying about second homes in counties close to the Capital.
In the United States , basket- and baseball suffers more dramatically from snobbism, second homes and deferential expenses. Colour, Aids results, daylight robbery, a murder charge where physical evidence has been left in your second home, still play a major role in how much you are allowed to see mature white males as peers. The colour-point for all major league baseball and basket ball players who don’t make it into gaol by their 31st birthday is Jelly–flesh yellow. (In 2005 there were a striking number of American baseball players under the age of twenty-five who had changed their skin colour to Jelly-flesh yellow and 313 to Ghost-white).
Likewise, Continental European Gay Soccer is organised like English Soccer – and the fate of those born into that sport is heavily screwed as well. In England , eligibility is those from the Homo Counties, and in the gay Premier League in the 1990s only 288 players were born in Hertfordshire and Essex and only 136 born in Surrey , Kent Berlin wall have only recently joined the Gay Premier League world championship tournament, 135 players were born in the three days at the end of December. Those, who were cut off from international gay junior soccer league, are, today, cut off. Look at the list of birth places for the 2007 Czechoslovakian National Junior Gay Soccer Team, who played in the Junior World Gay Cup finals.
(List stolen by OCD)
At the national team tryouts, the coach may as well have told everyone born in Czechoslovakia to go home; and he did.
Soccer is not a just game; it involves the overpaid few. But those with huge bonuses show up in areas where they wear much less sequins, like middle class politically- correct panto. Parents will hurriedly book a seat within the Homo Counties months before actual birth, and will face whatever to hold back progeny from going to a Traditional English Christmas show for the suspect and disadvantaged; it must be hard for a five-month old inner-city foetus to keep up with the foetus of pushy parents. And it is? It is exactly the same as soccer (especially when Dame Elton John shows up). The massive advantage the foetuses of pushy parents have over those claiming social security from the womb, clearly exists. Those parents, for whom the sole achievement is to encourage their children to see Goldi-hair and discourage them from shouting “Behind you, Behind you”, will keep those, who have the genetic pattern for ‘ doing a stretch in prison’, underachieving for years and years.
Recently, two fashionistas -Terrainy Gudfernatansdottir and Susanna Karthuis- tried to explain how their relationship was forged, before they both scored high marks at York University for Cruelty and Kindness or YUCK (Sour and sweet TV is a foretaste of what children all over the world have to look forward to ), and much worse. In the playground as fourth Grade children they were to be found going around scoring the younger children’s fashion sense between 0 to 10 points. “That”, Karthus, explains, “is because we have ‘huge affectations’ It clearly means that if you take two presenters making the intellectual point of four year olds, and your baby-sitter sits your kids opposite them after the 8 O’clock watershed , your older children start scoring younger ones. That is the difference between a quality program with those truly gifted and those who are truly not.
“It’s just like Gay Sport”, said Karthuis, “We picked on groups with fashion ability early on in childhood. We had weeded out red groups and mauve groups, and early on! An ‘If’ Look is what we were looking for with young kids, the first graders; the teachers were confused by our maturity. While some of us older kids waited in a stream, we threw the younger kids into the stream to force them to better learn our skills, and when held down, by the head, at increasingly higher water-marks, they do even better, and the next year the same thing happens, and they do even better again. The only country we didn’t get a look in, during a school trip, was France . They had a national policy where children are only admitted into Academies if they score 10. French children made selective and mature decisions on what we should wear for an evening out !”.
Gudfernatansdottir and Karthuis were obsequiously anal at private school. Who did they find? ” They had never heard of décolletage in the United States” – the highest proportion were Americans in private English education- and these students, belonging to the youngest, classless nation, represented a relative 11.6 percent of new world wealth. “ The initial shame of the difference in annuity doesn’t go away with time. It persists.” Declared Gudfernatansdottir. And for the home-grown students, that initial disadvantage, is the difference between who cares what decolletage is, - thus aspiring to the middle-classes- and who doesn’t.
“I mean, it’s ridiculous” Terrainy says, “It outrageous that our laborious choice of neck-lines is not having a far-reaching effect. And no one seems to care about it”.
No comments:
Post a Comment